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  Robert repeated, “You want to go see…” He stopped and tried to think what she could be saying.

  “Sir… cha.”

  So she didn’t want to go see something, she wanted to go somewhere.

  He put his hands on both sides of her face. “Keep trying,” he said.

  She thrust her tongue for a long time. To him, when she thrust, she went somewhere deep in her mind, closing out all that was around her.

  “Jess… eek, be… uff, Jezz… oz.”

  Jezzoz? he thought. He repeated it again and again in his mind. Then it came to him. “Jesus! You want to go to church?”

  “Oh… yes.” Gini felt so relieved that he understood. “Jess… eek, be… uff, hap… pee.”

  “She is.”

  “Be… uff, goo, teenk.”

  “She is very intelligent. Such big words she uses.”

  Gini giggled. “Jess… eek, uff, goo, bain. Nee… know… God.”

  He pulled her to his chest and hugged her. “Gini…” He was at a loss for words, not because she wanted to go to church, but because they were having a real conversation about their daughter.

  “Sweetheart, which church do you want to go to?”

  She shook her head.

  “Your birth certificate said your parents were Catholic. Do you want to go to a Catholic church?”

  She sat back. “No, know, wah, sir… cha.”

  “Do you remember Reverend Gilbert, the preacher who married us?”

  Gini got a vision of Robert and her facing each other, giving their vows. She shook her head yes.

  “He has a church here in New Haven. Do you want to try there?”

  “Oh… yes. Jess…eek, nee, be, pray… uff, God. Nee, be, play, more, keed.”

  Gini couldn’t remember anything before New Haven Medical Center C4, not her parents or anything about being a child, only her life with Robert and Debbie. It now seemed having a baby was some kind of dream, with vague images of her holding Jessica and breastfeeding her, then other things she couldn’t explain, like where they lived. She hadn’t remembered ever living there. And in this vague dream she found herself pleading for help when she struggled to recharge and live again. Then the words “pray to God” became clear in her head, and a spiritual feeling came over her. An image of kneeling in front of flickering candles appeared in her head—she was young, a girl—and then she saw a cross hanging on the wall. Music, yes, there was music, and she and Robert were holding each other’s hands and smiling. She tried so many times to put all the pieces together, but the fleeting thoughts made it difficult to concentrate and figure it all out. Working hard to have it clearer in her head, she soon realized that it was their wedding and it was in God’s house. She wanted to be there to pray and thank Him for helping her. She felt that same spiritual bond with Jessica. Jessica needed to learn about heaven, God, and Jesus. And Jessica needed to go to His house and rid herself of her fears and find His guidance.

  Robert’s emotions were creeping up his throat like a volcano ready to erupt, but he would suppress them. Those intense feelings weren’t going to take over this wonderful, remarkable moment with his bright, amazing partner for life.

  He grabbed her back to him and started rocking. “Gini, you realize you are talking. We are sitting here talking to each other.”

  She pushed back again. “Mouff… uff, wore… keen.” She flashed a bright smile.

  He put his hand behind her head and kissed her. She pushed forward, and they kissed again and again.

  Debbie was nearly pacing as she prepared the meal. The anticipation was killing her. Aly had gone back with Jessica to get her ready for dinner. They walked into the kitchen.

  “Debbie, I want to help,” Jessica said in her cute, squeaky voice.

  “Okay, pumpkin, you can put the napkins on the table.” Debbie handed them to her. The little girl giggled when they lay on her hands, held flat like a tray in front of her.

  “Are they still in there?” Alyssa asked.

  “They are,” Debbie said. “They are…” Her voice dropped.

  Chapter 12—Church

  There was a click, and the bedroom door opened. Debbie took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Gini and Robert had their arms around each other, and Gini was looking up at him, smiling, her dimples going deep in her cheeks. Debbie couldn’t help but get a warm feeling inside. It was so good to see her back to her old self—actually, much better. Gini seemed more alert and talked more, drank from her handled cup with ease, and she tried very hard to use a spoon to eat.

  “Daddy, Mama,” Jessica called out and ran to her parents, pushing her way between them. She held each of their hands, and they all walked to the kitchen.

  “Ah… isn’t that just the cutest family?” Alyssa put her fisted hands under her chin.

  “Everyone ready to eat?” Debbie asked, wanting to pry to find out what the conversation between them had been, but she knew if they wanted to talk about it, they would.

  “Smells good,” Robert said.

  Gini went to Debbie and hugged her. “Dee… bee, go… uff, sir… cha.” She opened her eyes and looked at Debbie.

  “Sweet girl.” Debbie brushed the side of her face. “What’s that? Where are you going?”

  “Sir… cha, be… uff, God.”

  Debbie looked at Robert, who had picked Jessica up into his arms. “Gini wants to go to church so Jessica can be around other children and learn about God and Jesus.”

  Debbie gave Gini a small hug. “Well, have fun with that.” She reached away from Gini to pick up the salad bowl from the counter to put on the table.

  “Dee… bee, go, sir… cha.”

  “No, baby. Church is not for me.”

  “Dee… bee, lah… uff.” Gini put her arms around Debbie’s waist.

  “Okay, let’s sit and eat,” Alyssa said, upbeat, trying to help Debbie get out of her tight spot since it looked like Gini was going to keep pressing Debbie.

  They went through dinner with no further discussion on the matter. That night after Gini and Jessica were in bed, Debbie brought it up.

  “I think that’s nice if Gini wants to go to church, but how do you feel about it?”

  “If Gini wants to do it, we’ll do it. Debbie, you should have seen her telling me, in all words, no signing. She reached deep down and pulled out all the words. It was so amazing having a real conversation about church and how we wanted our daughter to be around kids her age so she wouldn’t be so shy.” He sat back on the couch. Debbie could see how pleased he was, and she was happy for him.

  “I’m not going,” she proclaimed.

  “Okay, that’s not an issue. Gini will be fine with me and Jessica.”

  Debbie felt guilty. Could he handle taking care of both of them, especially if they both balked when they got there?

  “Robert, it’s just that church people don’t look kindly on people like me.”

  “And what kind of people is that?”

  “Gays and lesbians.”

  “Debbie, being gay does not define you. Being Debbie is what describes the person you are: kind, loving, devoted. Not to mention a great caregiver. If being gay is an issue with anybody, then they are going to have a problem with me.”

  Robert had known from the first week he knew Debbie that she was gay. It never made a difference to him or, as far as he could tell, to anyone they worked with. It was a non-issue, and he’d be surprised if it would be an issue for people at the church. But he’d have to admit he didn’t know much about religion. One of his foster families went once to an Easter service in a big park, but he’d never been to church church. He’d only been in one for weddings, memorials, or funerals. Since his dominant interest for most of his life was science, and he believed the scientific theories on how the universe formed and people evolved, as well as trusted that science was the greatest force for improving human life, he’d never thought about going to a Sunday service.

  “I’m going to call Reverend Gilbert and se
e if he will take us around his church to see if that’s where Gini wants to go. He married us, if you remember.”

  “I remember.” How could she forget the loving ceremony, so happy and touching? “I like the reverend. I used to see him all the time in the hospital talking to families of our patients. I guess I didn’t realize he had his own church.

  “I thought for sure you were going to come out of that room and announce Gini was pregnant.”

  “Pregnant? Hmm… well, I don’t think that will ever happen again since Linda has told us Gini’s hormones are low, and she’s probably going into early menopause.”

  “You’d be okay if she got pregnant again?”

  He looked straight at her. “Sure. I love being a father. If we want more children, we can adopt.”

  Debbie had to admit she was surprised that he was so calm about Gini getting pregnant again. But he was probably right; the chances of that happening were nearly impossible.

  The next day, the reverend and Robert had a talk about attending his house of worship, Gini’s disabilities, Jessica needing to be around other children, and made an appointment to learn about the church and do a walk-through. The time was set for Tuesday at four o’clock, when Robert got home from work.

  He had been instructed to pull under the porte-cochere at the front door and park there. The church secretary led them to the reverend’s office. Gini paused for a moment to listen to the music coming from the sanctuary, where the organist was practicing.

  “Please, please come in.” Reverend Gilbert stood to shake Robert’s hand. “Dr. Young, Mrs. Young, please have a seat.”

  Gini slowly spoke, telling him they had a three-year-old daughter. She spread out three fingers on her left hand when she said it. Robert took her other hand and squeezed it. The reverend was very patient, waiting for the next words from Gini. There were many silent moments.

  Gini wanted to tell him that she wanted Jessica to become familiar with God and Jesus and to be around children her age. But the words were stuck, so she started signing.

  Robert opened his mouth to translate the words, but before he could start, the reverend said, “We have a wonderful Sunday school program here.”

  “You sign?” Robert asked.

  “All my life. My grandfather was deaf, and he lived with us when I was a child.”

  He went on to tell them about the young youth minister, Pastor Daniel. “I’ll have him come in and talk to you after a while.”

  He walked around his desk and took Gini’s hand. “Mrs. Young, I remember your wedding so well. It was one of the sweetest I have ever officiated. I’m glad to see you so well and happy.”

  Gini smiled. “Guiney,” she said.

  “Yes, please, call her Gini and me Robert.”

  “Indeed. Would you like to see the church?”

  “Oh… yes.”

  Robert took her hand, and they walked into the large open entrance. “This is where we gather for fellowship before each service,” the reverend said.

  The organ music was still playing when they walked into the sanctuary. As they walked down the left side aisle, Gini touched each pew lightly with her hand. The music stopped when the organist messed up a passage.

  “Edie, could we have a minute,” he called up to the chamber.

  “Sure.”

  “Please.” The reverend motioned with his hand for them to sit in a pew, and he stood in front of them in the row ahead.

  “So, this is our house of worship.” He leaned over and put his hand on a book in the rack on the back of the pew. “Here we have our hymnals and Bible. We also put both the scripture and the hymn words up on our big screens.” He turned and pointed to the front of the room. “But some people like to hold the books.”

  Gini reached over and put her hand on the Bible in the rack. He took it out and laid it in her lap. Using the sides of her hands and fingertips, she opened the book and flipped large sections of pages. Robert sat with his arm around her, and the reverend had his hands crossed in front of him—both watching her.

  She stopped turning the pages and put her hands flat on the book.

  “The book of Proverbs,” the reverend said when he saw where her hands had stopped.

  “Oh… yes.”

  “‘The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction. Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.’ Proverbs one, seven through nine.” He said the verse from memory.

  Gini closed the book and held it to her body with her left arm.

  “As you heard, we have an organist, Edie. She’s been with us for years. Our early service is traditional, with a choir and the organ accompaniment. The later service is contemporary, with older children and adults singing and playing instruments. Each service is delightful; it depends on your preference.”

  He moved his hand to the aisle. “Let’s go up front.”

  Gini and Robert stood, and she held tight to the Bible.

  Once there, he pointed out the pulpits, communion table, and the kneeling board for those taking communion. Still holding the book, Gini knelt down with Robert’s help.

  “Oh, bless you, dear child,” the reverend said, putting his hand on her head.

  She stood.

  “Okay, Edie, we’re done,” he shouted up.

  On the way to the back, Gini stopped at the pew they had sat in and indicated for Robert to put the Bible back, which he did.

  Reverend Gilbert took them back through the open area, past his office and down a long hall, where he pointed out the all-purpose room and Sunday school classrooms.

  “Out those doors,” he pointed to the outside from the all-purpose room, “is where we have picnics and group gatherings when the weather is nice.

  “Let’s go back to my office, and I’ll ask Pastor Daniel to come in to talk to you.”

  Gini looked up at Robert with her eyes open and smiled.

  They sat for a few minutes until the two ministers entered from the back of his office.

  “Pastor Daniel, this is Dr. and Mrs. Young. Daniel is our youth minister. He’s wonderful with children.”

  “It’s very nice meeting you.” Robert and Daniel shook hands.

  When he spoke, the room filled with the sound of a rich, deep voice. Gini opened her eyes and focused on him. It felt to her like the sound was down in her heart. She could see a tall, gangling man with short, nicely combed dark hair. Her lids slowly closed, interrupting the vision.

  “Their daughter is three,” Reverend Gilbert said.

  “Jess…eek.”

  “I love that age,” Daniel said. “They are so innocent and full of life.”

  “Oh… yes.”

  Reverend Gilbert had told Daniel about Gini’s accident and her disabilities.

  “Our three- and four-year-olds share the same class. Marla Jenkins is the teacher. A wonderful single lady. The kids love her.”

  Reverend Gilbert went on to tell them all the children came into the sanctuary with their parents at the beginning of the service. After Pastor Daniel called them all up front for a children’s sermon and song, they went off to Sunday school.

  “Jessica is very shy and uneasy around strangers,” Gini signed. Daniel signed back and then realized Gini’s eyes were closed.

  “You also sign,” Robert said after he had spoken Gini’s and the pastor’s words.

  “When I first started here, I noticed a lot of the mothers were signing to their infants. I found it most fascinating.”

  His voice was like music filling Gini’s ears. He made her feel so relaxed and comfortable.

  “So I took a course. It was slow going at first, but now I do pretty well and volunteer at the school for the deaf over in Roxbury once a week. Great people there.

  “Would you be opposed to me and the reverend coming to your house so I can meet and visit with Jessica? It may make her first
time here easier.”

  All agreed that would be a good idea, and they decided to do it the following Thursday evening.

  “It was very nice meeting you. I looked forward to meeting your daughter.” Daniel left the room.

  Reverend Gilbert handed Robert several brochures that told more about the church, their programs, and events. “Do you have any questions?”

  Gini slowly signed, “Are lesbians welcome here?”

  “Gini, everyone is welcome to come through our doors and stay as long as they like. We are open to all faiths. We preach God’s word to whoever wants to listen and participate.”

  Gini looked at Robert and gave a big smile. He knew Debbie wasn’t going to be happy Gini had asked the question.

  This church was the first one built in the small town. Reverend Gilbert came with the new church. The building and the congregation had grown significantly over the years. The large sign out front read, “New Haven Christian Church, non-denominational, all are welcome.”

  When they got home, Gini was so excited, she couldn’t sign or speak fast enough to tell of her joy. Debbie wrapped her arms tight around her. “Slow down, baby. I take it it went well, and you like the place.”

  “Oh… yes.” Gini told of the beautiful organ music, Pastor Daniel’s soothing voice, and the kindness of Reverend Gilbert.

  “Did you like it, Robert?” Debbie asked.

  “Yes, very much. I think Jessica will be welcomed with open arms. The ministers are coming here on Thursday to meet her.”

  “Here?”

  “Yes.”

  “What time?”

  “Around seven-thirty.”

  “I’ll make myself scarce.”

  “Eet, be… uff, o, k. Sir…cha, take, lees…be… in. Guiney, ask. Et, be… uff, o, k.” She grinned.

  “Robert!” Debbie gasped.

  “Be… uff, o, k.” Gini hugged Debbie tight.

  Later, when the house was quiet, Debbie came out of her room into the great room. She glared at Robert. “I can’t believe you asked.”

  “I didn’t. Gini did.”

  “Robert, that’s my business.”

  “She didn’t say why she was asking. She just asked the question.”